Here is my Christmas wish list:
- A pair of legs that don't ache after a day of chasing kids (no purple ones please).
- Arms that don't flap in the breeze but are still strong enough to carry a toddler.
- A waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month of my last pregnancy.
- A talking doll that says, "Yes Mommy" to boost my parental confidence.
- Three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools.
- Please declare ketchup a vegetable to clear my conscience when feeding it to my children.
- A recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother", because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range.
- Play dough travel pack, the hottest stocking stuffer this year for mothers of preschoolers. It comes in three fluorescent colors and is guaranteed to crumble on any carpet making the in-laws' house seem just like mine.
If it's too late to find any of these products or services, I'll settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature.
Yours truly,
Mom
This was in my MOMS group newsletter :)
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